World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio comes to the ring. Ricardo and Alberto are booed. Oddly, they decided to show crowd shots of people booing their face champion. Which tells me that he is no longer a face. Or else they wouldn’t be showing these crowd shots. The World Heavyweight Championship is pretty worthless anyways. Del Rio calls Ziggler a coward, complains that the crowd cheered for Ziggler, and complains about people yelling USA at him. Yup, Del Rio is a heel. Ziggler is a face. It’s going to be interesting to see Ziggler as a face and his entourage as heels. Del Rio says that Americans are cowards. He wants the people to give him the respect he deserves.
CM Punk’s music hits. Big crowd reaction. The Universe is upside down. Heels are being cheered and faces are being booed! Punk brings up how he beat Del Rio for the WWE Championship and held it for 434 days. Punk has a problem with Del Rio calling himself “the best.” Punk challenges Del Rio. Heyman interrupts. This angers Punk. They argue a little furthering their new dissension. Punk and Heyman splitting ends in a Punk/Lesnar Summerslam match. Del Rio says that Punk doesn’t want him. Cue Team Brickie. Vickie says that she gets to make the decision. Brad Maddox watches her, but he does it awesomely. Vickie makes the match tonight. It’s non title. Boo. Apparently Vickie also has a big surprise for the McMahon’s tonight. Bryan will also face Orton. Should be good. Continue reading →
Triple H vs. Curtis Axel w/ Paul Heyman- Well this is a cool start. Love when Raw starts with wrestling. So does this mean Axel isn’t in the main event tonight? First time in four weeks. Triple H attacks with punches. He hits and kicks Axel in the corner. Suplex followed by a one count. I love one counts. Vince McMahon’s music hits. Triple H applies a side headlock as Vince makes his way down the aisle. Axel reverses and uses a shoulder block after a whip. Triple H reverses a whip and tosses Axel to the outside floor. Vince McMahon rings the bell. He takes ring announcer Justin Roberts announce Curtis Axel the winner by disqualification. Vince walks up the ramp with a smile on his face while Triple H shouts at him. I like this angle a lot. What’s up with the change in style lately? Triple H rings the bell and makes Justin Roberts restart the match. Love it. A power struggle.
Triple H applies a side head lock. Vince McMahon makes his way down the ramp again. Shoulder block by Triple H. Vince rings the bell again. He makes Justin Roberts announce Curtis Axel the winner by forfeit. Vince heads up the ramp. Axel and Heyman celebrate. Triple H goes to Justin Roberts again. He makes Justin Roberts announce that this is now a 60 minute Iron Man match. Vince comes back down the aisle. He makes Curtis Axel leave and go to the back. Vince takes the ring announcer microphone and the ring bell and takes them up the ramp. That was awesome. It twas also hilarious. I’ve never seen a start like that before. Since when does the WWE stray away from doing the same recycled garbage? I don’t know what made them decide to switch things up three weeks ago, but I love it. These shows have been reminding me of the ones in the early 2000′s. Post Attitude-Era still solid and edgy like shows. That was the shortest Iron Man match ever. By my count Axel is now 6-0 having won 3 matches tonight. Winner by Disqualification/forfeit/no more ring bell: Curtis Axel Continue reading →
I want Bray Wyatt tonight. Like tonight. Now. Give me.
Raw begins with Stephanie McMahon coming to the ring. Yes, for real. Jerry Lawler says, “any idea what she’s doing here.” Uhhhhhhhhh maybe her dad owns the place? Uhhhhhhhh maybe her husband is in charge of the talent? Stephanie announces that she’s made an executive decision to not allow Triple H to compete tonight. Really weird how she keeps calling him Triple H. Vince McMahon comes to the ring. Well this is an interesting start. Giving me an old school feel tonight. Last week’s Raw kind of did that too. I hope this new push to do new things on television lasts a little while. Keep it fresh. Vince tells the crowd not to boo his daughter. So they boo. Vince says that she’s right. The crowd chants for Triple H. Vince asks the people what they want from him. He tells the people that WWE is family entertainment and not a blood sport. That’s too bad Vince. He brings up how the people chanted “one more time” when Kofi was put through a table last week. Vince tells the people that they are beneath Triple H.
The Shield’s music hits. Another interesting twist. Stephanie McMahon getting a Shield triple power bomb would make my night. But instead we get a commercial break. Will it come back with the repetitive six man tag match that they advertised? I hope it comes back with Stephanie triple power bomb. There’s one question everyone is thinking right now. What does Triple H think about all these people coming into his office? The commercial break is now over. And here comes Orton for the repetitive six man tag. Boo. Continue reading →
WWE Raw Results 5/27/13 from Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Raw begins with John Cena coming to the ring. He blabbers about this Ryback feud thing. The crowd chants “we want Bret.” As do I. Love it. Cena acknowledges the crowd’s request and says that time will come. He does a Ryback A.D.D. impression. Cena doesn’t want an ambulance match, he wants a three stages of hell match. Where did that come from? I would much rather see that. Very unique. Cena says stage one will be a lumberjack match, stage two will be a tables match, and stage three will be an ambulance match. These are not the stipulations of a good three stages of hell match. Booooooooo. The third stage has to be a Hell in a Cell, hence the name. So Ryback comes to the stage. He calls himself “Lucifer” and “Satan.” Well that’s not PG. He walks to the back.
Paul Heyman comes out to the stage. He claims that Curtis Axel beat Triple H so decisively last week that you won’t see him anymore. He introduces him. Axel comes out to another new theme song that does not have the Mr. Perfect theme in it anymore. Terrible. I no longer care about him. Heyman proposes Cena vs. Axel. Cena tells Axel that he needs to stay far away from Heyman. He tells Axel that he got lucky last week. Cena accepts. IT”S ON!!!!!!! I’m not excited. I want Bret Hart. I care of nothing else. I’m also checking out this WWE App thing. During the break there is a Jericho promo. Continue reading →
Raw begins with an ambulance pulling into the arena. It’s Ryback! And they had his music cued and ready. Ryback cuts a promo from on top of the ambulance. If you can call hit a promo. He shows footage from Extreme Rules where Cena refused to get in an ambulance. This is new to me. I wasn’t interested in watching the PPV because the product has been bad lately. However, I believe that I got every match right on my predictions last week. So anyways, Ryback challenges Cena to an “Ambulance Match” at the next PPV titled, “Payback.” Yuck. What a bad PPV name. They should have replaced that garbage with King of the Ring. It will be June after all.
Ryback talks about putting Cena in the morgue. He says “there is only one fact of life….Ryback Rules!!!!” Love that line. That was a unique open. The commentators tease that Heyman will be naming his next client tonight. Interesting. That’s an immediate push for someone. I like. Highly intrigued. I hope it’s Cesaro. That would do a lot for him. A debuting Kassius Ohno would be phenomenal also. How about a Zack Ryder heel turn? I’d love it. I’m actually getting my hopes up for this one. My golden rule is to never let that happen with WWE, but I’m going to put my emotions at stake tonight. Continue reading →
Raw begins with Jerry Lawler in the ring. He hypes the Fandango/Jericho feud. It’s time for a dance off. The floor in the ring is a wood dancing floor, or something like that. Fandango comes down the aisle with Summer Rae. The crowd begins Fandango’ing. They are a little weak. Michael Cole calls Fandango’s fiery silhouette a ” giant Lite-Brite Kit.” Jericho comes down the aisle with a Spanish chick who used to be on “Dancing with the Stars.” Fandango tells the crowd that they have to respect his performance as an artist. He knows he will beat Jericho. I love everything Fandango, but he’s awful on the mic. Jericho reminds everyone that he was the first Raw musical chairs and “Price is Raw” champion. He says he’s going to create a new dance sensation at Extreme Rules. He’s going to dance all over Fandango’s face. It’s dance time.
Fandango and Summer are first. Fandango won’t start and then kills the music. This is riveting TV. He wants silence. Then he dances. Summer falls and twists her ankle. Fandango yells at her. Everyone attends to her. Fandango leaves. Then he hits the ring and attacks Jericho from behind. Boot to the face followed by punching. He kicks Jericho out of the ring then tosses him into the announce table. Fandango whips Jericho into the steel steps. He takes a piece of the wood floor and nails Jericho in the head with it. Fandango gets back into the ring and picks up Summer, who was playing possum all along. WHAT A TURN!!!! That was awful. Is that it? I can turn to the Caps game now right? Yup, end of segment. Continue reading →
Raw begins with John Cena coming to the ring. I’m not minding him as champion or this feud with Ryback thus far. It feels fresh. Cena does the Daniel Bryan “Yes” and “No” and his normal comedy shtick about Ryback. At one point he does the Fandango dance. He says he will wrestle every week if medically cleared. He says he hasn’t been 100% since 2002. Vickie Guerrero comes out yelling, what else, “excuse me.” Vickie is not fresh by the way. This GM thing isn’t really working for her anymore. Her role is minimal. Vickie’s point of existing tonight to make a stipulation for Cena/Ryback. So she brings Ryback to the ring. I hope he says “Ryback rules.” That’s the best catch phrase in wrestling right now.
Vickie asks Cena what stipulation he wants. Cena wants a “whine off” to give Ryback a chance to win. He does a pretty good impression of Ryback and jokes about him being angry that Cena owes him $1.67 for an international call. Cena also suggests “Vickie’s granny panties on a pole” match. But then he says nobody should have to see that. Ryback cuts a monotone promo and eventually says “Ryback rules.” YESSSSSSSSS! Ryback Rules > O’Doyle Rules. He eventually picks a Last Man Standing match. Get it? Cause Cena has an Achilles injury. So it’s a last man standing. Get it? Continue reading →
I hate when Raw is taped. I do not look at spoilers though, so this is a surprise to me. A three minute opening video starts Raw. Very very very very very very very very long. Three minutes is like an eternity in TV time.
Paul Heyman is already in the ring. The British crowd is already hot. They chant “ECW.” Heyman says he’s here for Brock Lesnar. He says the world has been a buzz since Lesnar destroyed 3MB last week. Oh yes, such a buzz. It’s all everyone has been talking about obviously. Heyman then shows the clip. He says that Triple H is not at Raw tonight to give his answer to last week’s challenge. He reads an email from Triple H that says he will give his answer next week. Heyman says he was going to shake Triple H’s hand, but the gutless coward let him down.
Triple H’s music hits. He slowly comes to the ring. Ten minutes have already passed in this show and nothing has happened. Triple H says he lied about the email. I think that was supposed to comedy. Triple H says he accepts, grabs Heyman, and delivers a Pedigree. I don’t think I’ve ever typed the word Pedigree in this article before, because I had to think about how to spell it. Interesting. Heyman doesn’t even flinch in the ring as Triple H heads up the ramp. Paul Heyman sells better than Orton. Weak opening segment. I guess Triple H’s “star power” was supposed to make that a hot start. Continue reading →
Handicap Match: Randy Orton and Sheamus vs. The Big Show- It’s been awhile since Raw has begun with an actual wrestling match. This same match happened on Smackdown this past week, but for some reason they decided not to mention that. They are acting as if this match is the payoff from last Monday’s Raw, but it isn’t really. Big Show and Sheamus start. Big Show powers him into the corner. Sheamus fights back with kicks and applies and a side headlock. Big Show counters the hold into a side slam. Sheamus continues to fight back, but is hit with a clothesline. Sheamus rolls to the outside apron, shoulder thrusts, and uses his chest pounds through the ropes. He climbs to the top and uses The Battering Ram for a two count. Sheamus misses The Brogue Kick and is thrown to the outside floor. Orton climbs down to cheer him. Back in the ring, Big Show uses headbutts and multiple chops against the ropes. Final Cut for a two count. Orton breaks up the fall. Sheamus fights back from his knees, but is cut off with a knee strike. Sheamus fights up from an arm bar, but is caught in a side slam. Two count.
Big Show goes for a Vader Bomb, but Sheamus stops him. Sheamus puts Big Show on his shoulders and drops him back with an electric chair drop. That was pretty impressive. Tag to Sheamus. He comes in on fire with punches. After a clothesline and dropkick he finally takes Big Show off his feet. Big Show rolls to the outside apron where he’s kicked in the head. DDT through the ropes by Orton. Randy signals RKO. Big Show pushes out, wraps his hand around Orton’s throat, is hit with a Brogue Kick by Sheamus, and an RKO by Orton. The three count for the win. Orton and Sheamus celebrate. Decent opening match. The electric chair drop really made the match worth watching. Most people aren’t really into this feud. All three of these guys are pretty stale and are pretty much on cruise control. You have to wonder how long it will be before Orton or Sheamus turn on one another. Because they have hostile personalities that’s why! Winners: Randy Orton and Sheamus Continue reading →
My recap is late tonight because I just arrived home from New York City where I attended Wrestlemania live. Throughout this article I intend on giving some live event information that may not have been portrayed well on TV.
Raw begins with John Cena coming to the ring. He is the new WWE Champion. The smark crowd is super hot and boos Cena loudly. There were some reports that the crowd at Wrestlemania was a little dead. This isn’t true. The arena was so huge that different things were happening in different parts of the arena. It was nearly impossible for people to get chants done in unison. That explains a lot of the “dead crowd” theory. It surely wasn’t. This crowd tonight is proof of that, because it’s the same crowd. The crowd boos very loudly after every single line that Cena says. Cena plays it off well and plays around with the crowd. He purposefully gets them to boo. They begin to chant “boring” at Cena. This is very reminiscent of the Raw after Mania last year when the crowd yelled “yes” from start to finish. These hot crowds are going to make “the day after Wrestlemania” a yearly must see.
Cena taunts the crowd by asking them what kind of dance moves they want to see. He does a heel turn and the crowd pops. Your a sly one Cena, very sly. Cena yells “the champ is here.” The crowd chants “same old shit.” That is probably the first time I’ve ever heard that in WWE. Cena says he’s going to defend his title tonight. Mark Henry comes down the aisle. The crowd chants “sexual chocolate” loudly. Just like they did at Wrestlemania. Cena says “it’s a ruckus crowd and they want to have sex with chocolate.” That gets a “yes” chant from the crowd. Henry blabbers about how he wants to have a match. Cena tells Henry that he “has the breath of 1,000 asses.” Good line. Cena tells Henry that he has the match. Continue reading →